One foe that both parents and children must contend with: exams

Anxiety is sprouting in many of our children at this time of year, when the weather is cooling down.Soon as summer approaches and the weather starts warming up  again and the flowers are blooming their brightest hues. The "all or nothing" atmosphere of high stakes testing creates swarms of fear and anxiety in the minds of pupils during the summer months.

When we're parents, we may experience how these feelings materialize personally. The question, "Mom, do you think I'll pass?" has been asked so many times. It's hard for my coworker's 10-year-old kid to sleep at night because he's worried about missing just one or two questions on his next high school exam. As a result, students in all grades appear to be under a great deal of stress as a result of the tremendous focus placed on test achievement.


Even though some uneasiness is normal, over-anxiousness and obsessing over the worst-case scenario might actually harm your performance.


Confidence can be disrupted by physical symptoms such as tense shaking, sobbing, and "butterflies" in the stomach. Fear and negative thinking can cause youngsters to "blank out" or second-guess themselves during an exam, even if they have studied and are confident in their answers. Test anxiety can be alleviated by encouraging youngsters and assisting them in focusing on good outcomes.


In the midst of supporting your child through exams, here are some pointers for parents:


How well your teachers are educating you is not what the test is measuring.."


If a child's performance is personalized (good or negative), they are more likely to associate that performance with feelings of self-worth or lack thereof, according to research. A alternative strategy is possible instead of allowing her youngster to personalize his performance. It was a father of a 10-year-old boy who was suffering nightmares and was on the verge of an emotional collapse, despite being a school topper in his grade.


That's why she explained to her son that examinations are meant to measure how successfully a school or school district educates its kids, and the only way to do that is by asking pupils questions to find out what they've learned. She was able to alleviate her son's anxiety by handing over some of the duty to the school. A lesson learned from this experience helped him to realize that standardized tests are not the only way to measure his intelligence.


As a result, "the test is not a reflection of the complete YOU."


Suppose a mom has an anxious 7th-grader and identical twin boys. It was common for people to note on how different each of the twins looked when they were pictured together. Isn't it obvious that they're different? A photograph is a moment in time that captures the twins performing various things at the same time. It is possible that one twin may be smiling while the other is not; one may be tilting his head to the right while the other is gazing at the camera, making them appear different in that particular moment. In other words, it doesn't indicate that they aren't identical.


She utilized the same example to assist ease her older children's exam-related stress. A single snapshot of time is captured by the test, she explains to him. The photo just shows one facet of his brothers, and a single test does not tell the complete story about him. When she spoke to him, she reminded him of his academic achievements. Highlight their non-academic triumphs, such being named Junior Coach and receiving the "Student Of The Week" award, in an effort to help him realize that a single test does not define him as either a student or as an individual.


"The most important thing is to try your best," as the saying goes.


Encourage children by praising their efforts as well as their results. There is a direct correlation between effort and success, according to studies. It is possible for children to recognize that their "smartness" or lack thereof is not a limiting factor in their achievement if they understand that hard work and dedication lead to success. The growth mentality is a term for this type of thinking. When children have a development mentality, they can see that their entire achievement is not limited by one test on one day, but rather by their performance throughout the school year, their hard work, their commitment, and their character.


"Put your ideas in a favorable direction."


Motivation can be increased by cultivating an attitude of gratitude.


When we experience negative emotions, our bodies are wired to shut down all other thoughts and focus only on what's causing the emotion. This makes it difficult for the mind to work optimally. The opposite is true: thinking positively helps people widen their perspectives and focus their attention, both of which lead to increased productivity.


It's important for parents to assist their children cultivate a positive mindset by encouraging them to focus on their accomplishments rather than their failures on tests.


When given an incentive, such as a trip to the mall with the family after the test, youngsters are more likely to focus on the end result than than the process of taking the test.


Having children write down their ideas can also be a terrific method to help them deal with their anxieties. It has been found that writing about test-related anxiety before the test improves performance.


It is understandable that teachers and schools place a great deal of importance on grades. Many more often than I realize, parents instill a sense of urgency by bringing up the upcoming test, saying things like, "We need to make sure that you [my son] are [ready for the boards]" or "You're in 4th grade; we have to take studies seriously. In addition to reflecting the adults in their lives, children often seek to adults for guidance on how to deal with stressful situations. Anxiety in adults can cause anxiosity in children, as well. Alternatively, they can try to remain calm, grounded, and positive.


Parental support can be crucial in helping youngsters cope with test anxiety. You need to be mindful, encouraging and make sure your youngster knows that you support him or her.

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